Dear
Readers,
These columns began on my area of America Online, called: Judaism
Today: Where Do I Fit? People anonymously
sent me E-Mail, and I began to choose one for a public response
in my Jewish E-Mail of the Week column. The column has become
quite popular and is now syndicated internationally in many
Jewish papers and websites. I hope you find they help you
as you think about the Ethics, Spirituality and Peoplehood
components of the Jewish way of Life. I welcome your
comments... see the end of the column.
Gil
PS
Teachers and others, feel free to copy my columns and forward
them or use them as you see fit. Please see the friendly
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Dear
Gil:
I
am 39 and have just recently been told that my
grandfather escaped Russia and was Jewish. My
siblings and I were raised in a Christian
family, but for some reason I never felt like I
belonged.
My
adult life has been spent searching for
something I felt that I have lost. The need to
find out everything I can on Judaism is
insatiable. I cannot absorb enough information.
How do I make the decision to pursue my
heritage? Is there anyone I can consult on the
feelings I am experiencing? Are there more of us
out there? The conflict within me is very strong
and this inner battle needs to come to an end.
Thank you for reading my e-mail.
L
Dear
L:
Take
comfort in knowing that there are many others
like you. I know this because I have received a
number of Emails from others that are similar to
you letter. Technically you are not Jewish
unless you formally study and embrace the Jewish
way of life. In other words convert to Judaism.
Perhaps this is an option for you.
In
the course of my travels and lecturing I met a
most extraordinary gentleman who shared some
circumstances with you. He grew up in Germany to
a Jewish father and Protestant mother. When he
was 6, the Nazis came to power. He received no
religious education, but to protect him, his
parents had him baptized. The persecution was so
severe and the situation so desperate that his
mother committed suicide during the war. After
that, he and his father were thrown into labor
camps. When the war ended, he had no family and
because he was not Jewish, he got no help from
Jewish relief agencies.
With
the help of a Protestant organization he was
brought to the US. He got involved in the church
and eventually became an ordained Christian
minister. But like you, he always felt a piece
of himself did not quite fit. When he was almost
65 he decided that he needed to be true to
himself and he converted to Judaism...the
religion of his father.
By
converting, he is far from alone. A little known
fact is that in the US, there are an estimated
200,000 converts to Judaism, or to use the more
beautiful term "Jews by Choice." This
is an especially impressive number when you
consider that there is a total of only between 5
and 6 million Jews in the US. Their contribution
to our people goes beyond numbers. I wish that
all Jews by birth (or "Jews by chance"
as I like to call us) were as serious about
their Judaism as most of the Jews by Choice I've
met.
PLEASE
don't misunderstand me however, I am NOT trying
to pressure you! On the contrary I would suggest
you carefully and slowly consider whether or not
you want to convert. But your letter indicates a
yearning to me that might make conversion a
correct decision for you. To help you decide,
here are 5 suggestions:
1.
Continue to learn as much as you can about
Judaism. Read, explore the web, go to lectures,
take introductory courses on Judaism which are
offered by many colleges and Jewish
congregations and talk to some Jewish friends.
2.
See if Judaism's basic beliefs and practices
make sense to you. Remember, though, that
Judaism is a faith of deeds, not forced creeds.
Nonetheless, here are some general Jewish
beliefs that are widely held among Jews:
*
Judaism introduced the world to the idea that
God is one, not many, and is kind, loving, and
personal. In Judaism you pray directly to God
and can receive help, guidance, and
understanding. You can pray on your own and
with a prayer community in a Jewish
congregation.
*
Judaism doesn't accept the idea that people
are born evil. Rather, people have free will
to choose between right and wrong.
*
Judaism encourages religious freedom of
thought. Judaism welcomes probing spiritual
questions.
*
Judaism has, for 4000 years, emphasized a
strong sense of family and the value of a
close community.
3.
Experience Judaism as it is lived. Visit a
Jewish congregation to sample a service or
attend a Jewish ceremony, such as a Passover
seder or a Sabbath meal. Visit a JCC and a
Jewish bookstore.
4.
Talk about your thoughts and feelings with your
partner, your friends and your family. It is
common to experience some moments of doubt or
fear of the unknown. It is also vital that you
stay in touch with your birth family. Converting
to Judaism does not mean you are abandoning your
family and friends.
5.
As early as possible, but especially as you get
more serious about actually becoming Jewish, you
should talk to rabbis of the different Jewish
movements.
These
suggestions come from Dr. Larry Epstein, a
leading expert on conversion who manages a very
helpful website that I highly recommend: http://www.convert.org/.
There are far too many resource there than I can
list here, but I feel confident you will find
many answers there to the questions you are so
earnestly asking. Please keep me posted on your
searching and good luck!
Gil
A FRIENDLY COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© Copyright Gil Mann
These columns can be found at www.beingjewish.org. Not
only do I give you permissions to copy these Jewish Email
columns...I HOPE YOU WILL and that you share them with others!
All I ask is that you never charge anyone for them and that you
also include this little copyright notice. Thank You!
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